Page 1424 - Week 04 - Thursday, 4 April 2019
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fitted a neck brace and helped drag the man from the water, with the assistance of paramedics. At the time he said anyone else would have done the same thing because it simply had to be done.
It is Dave’s relationships that define him. I am quite certain that he knew almost everybody in Canberra. Every day that people got to spend with Dave was a gift. In the words of his friend Kate, “Dave was my best mate, but there would be at least 10 other people who would say the same thing.”
He held his friends and his family in high regard, with never a bad word uttered about anyone. He had this amazing ability to stay in touch with people. When visiting different towns, if he was not seeking out a friend from his extensive network to catch up with, you could be assured he would be making a new friend. He was so very generous in all that he did, including his support for Camp Quality and for Menslink, with Menslink CEO Martin Fisk recently describing him to me as one of their best volunteer mentors.
He is remembered for his smirks and his big smiles, his laughter and the many, many good times. And he loved no-one more than his two beautiful children, Kayne and Kate.
But beneath all Dave’s extraordinary qualities was a struggle. Towards the end of his Navy career and afterwards, he wrote candidly and eloquently about what he was going through. His medals were not free. Dave had seen and lived through harrowing and traumatic events during his career and in his personal life, not least the death of his son, Kayne, at just 36 days old.
He spoke openly of the contest within him, of the pride in serving his country, which battled being apart from his family, and of the enduring impact of this. As recently as December Dave wrote, “For the first time in a long time, I don’t want to help out just other people. I want to help me. I want to help myself become a better man, a man strong enough to be loved.”
Dave was so loved. He had incredible support from his family and his friends and from Veterans 360 as he searched for answers through his own personal war zone. Tragically, the answer for Dave has caused a whole new war zone for the loved ones left behind.
But with the determination of Dave’s loved ones, he will not be defined by how he died. He will be defined by his love of the Navy, his career, his desire to fix the world, his love of people, his fight, his tenacity, his compassion, his humour and his amazing mind. Throughout his life Dave was a great teacher and that, perhaps most of all, is what will continue to define him, because there is so much to learn from Dave and from his life.
Dave has already taught us that we must do better for our veterans, particularly once they discharge. It is simply wretched that what Dave went through is not unique, and we must do more. It is for this reason that Dave’s story cannot be over. And it is not. Rest in peace, Dave.
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